Previewing The State Of The Union

Tomorrow is Fat Tuesday which is more important than watching the SOTU, so I’ll preview it for you.

Obama: Jobs, economy, immigration, guns, shit congress won’t let me do, thank you and God Bless America.

Rubio: We won’t change our policies but we’ll try to be nicer to the brown people and also not say rape as frequently. And Obamacare is bad mkay.

Paul: (unintelligible)

Now you can go drink.

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